To add insult over the injury, I received a letter from my father accusing me that I was responsible for all that had happened to Subhash’s family, and I was not welcome to Asansol ever. I felt like ending my life, but again it was Ratna, who though grieving equally, helped me regain some semblance in my life. She came closer to me and encouraged me to be more frank and motivated me to fight till the end to make our life tolerable.No one in the family blamed me for the tragedy; instead they tried their best to console me. I vowed to myself that I would never leave Ratna and my mother-in-law, what ever happens. To some extent it was true that the tragedy happened only because I married Subhash and so they went to Asansol. So I was to blame if not directly, but indirectly. In due course of time I started to live again, dream again but with Ratna. She became a part of me, always making me happy. When Ratna got a job, things started getting better and we settled as a family. I loved Ratna. After several lap dances with various dancers, wesettled on Tricia. Shortly, we ended up in a fantasyroom. Tricia put on an extraordinary show and Nicolette and Iboth were enjoying it immensely. At one point, Triciaeven asked that I leave the room so she could put on aprivate show just for Nicolette. Of course, Nicolette wasagreeable to this so I went out and had a drink whilethey stayed together in the room.I get a lot of enjoyment out of knowing that Nicolette isenjoying herself. That night was no exception. After mydrink, I went back to the room and we talked with Triciafor a while and invited her back to our table for adrink. Try as we might, we could not talk her into going backto the hotel with us. At closing time we left, both ofus feeling very frustrated.As we were driving back to the hotel we passed an adultbookstore and novelty shop. I swung the caddy around andwe went back. Nicolette had expressed a desire to get someben-wa balls and I thought it was as good a time as any..
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