.. any relation to Mercedes Benz?"Flight Attendant: "Yes sir, very close"Businessman: "How close?"Flight Attendant: "Same price"Absolutely clever and oddly truthful this ought to take some of the curse out of it.THE PULITZER COLONOSCOPYABOUT THE WRITER: Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor columnist for the Miami Herald.Colonoscopy Journal:I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy.A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis.Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner.I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my brain was shrieking, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR BEHIND!'I left Andy's office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called 'MoviPrep, ' which comes in a. "What is it Peter?" Lois asked. "Is Brianna alright?"Peter looked at Lois andonce again covered the phone, "Mybrother and sister-in-law are dead. Theywere hit by a Mexican food truck."Lois gasped, "Oh no. Poor Brianna."Peter put the phone back to his ear where a beeping soundcould be heard, "HeyBri, I know you're going through a rough time right now with your parents being dead and all, but I got another call coming in… SoI'm going to put you onhold."Lois watched in amazement as Peter put his only niece, who was probablycrying, on holdto answer a call that could have probably waited."Hello? Oh hey Quagmire… What? That's horrible? Oh my Godare you okay?" Peter covered the phone and looked at his wife, "They cancelled Quagmire's subscription to Chicks-R-Us. Now he can't watchhis porn for free. There is no God." Peter said darkly.Lois hit Peter and grabbed the phone from him, "For Godsakes Peter! Your brother just diedand you just put your niece on hold when she needs you the most." Lois.
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