We got a couple of serious situations on our hands. As I see it, there isn’t much either one of us can do.” Said Farty Jimbo. “You should go down there to the Plaza and check out the Grassy Knoll.”“Maybe I will” said Tuesday, “I’ll be back in 1998 soon.”“I’m making a Southwestern-style ass hair meatloaf. I was just about to dry shave my ass when you called.” Replied Farty Jimbo“All right. I’ll let you go. Buy a couple thousand shares of Intel and a bunch of Microsoft.” Tuesday Wells hung up and didn’t see Farty Jimbo again until 1998.Farty Jimbo hung up. The next day, Jeffrey Dahmer was arrested. Farty Jimbo wrote the following poem.“Her face was thin through vomitA chemical sheen on her forehead caked over a tan booth bronzeLooking at her gave me a warm scrotal rush that was not unpleasantAnd oh to have my stiffened spunk hoseEmbraced by the sleek and shiny lipsLips glossed with ultra-lip plumping ingredients for irresistibly luscious lips - glazed with unsurpassed shineLocked. " Maybe you should be taking junior courses." My tone made my insincerity obvious.He hesitated, as if reluctant to speak. "I am." How can you be taking advanced courses as a freshman?" I placed out of some stuff on the entrance evaluation exams." What courses?" Ah, just some stuff. Nothing important. Jen says you were homecoming queen last year. Does that take a lot of time away from your studies?" Nah. I'm pretty smart. I keep up with the stuff pretty easily." And I can recognize a segue, though it was pretty smooth."You're fortunate. Some people here have to work very hard to do well." Thanks." When was he going to mention my breathtaking beauty? I had never been on any kind of date where the guy didn't almost wax poetic over it unless he was tripping over his tongue. What was wrong with this guy?"If I'm talking too much just tell me. I know you expected to get some studying done," he said."Yeah. Maybe we should do a little."I was inclined to think about him, to speculate on what.
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